My time in the Memory Unit of my local hospice was absolutely transformational. I was fortunate enough to volunteer with two musicians, so we formed a musical trio and performed for some of the patients. It was astounding to see music’s power in these moments. Unfortunately, these people were losing or had lost many of their memories. It is hard to think of who we would be without our memories—are we really ourselves at all? Observing music’s incredible effects on some patient’s attentions and moods, however, reinforced to me that we will always have an essential humanity within us. This humanity is something we can never be separated from, come illness or death.
A particularly special moment was during a performance in February. A patient we had seen before appeared to be having a difficult day and was not connecting to the performance. We sang and played all different kinds of music, but our presence was only soliciting frustration. However, many of the patients in the room were enjoying the music, so we continued on. Near the end of our performance, we sang Elvis’ “Can’t Help Falling in Love with You.” Almost immediately, this patient’s face and body language changed. I could see her lips mouthing the words as we sang. In this moment, I was struck with great joy. It was amazing to see a person find comfort and relaxation after a period of distress.
I was also struck by the spirit of caregiving that exists in the hospice context. I have been in clinical contexts before, but end-of-life care has a different timbre to it—these people are caring for others in their final days, which requires a particularly caring heart. Through my experience in hospice and from our readings and TedTalks, I have seen what is admirable about modern end-of-life care as well as the changes that still need to be made. I want to pursue medicine so that I am in a position to institute some of these changes.
The “Being Mortal” film we watched at the beginning of this academic year stressed the importance of knowing your own or your loved one’s priorities at the end of life. The film followed multiple people with terminal conditions as they spent their final months, weeks, days with their families. Something that struck me about their desires was that most people simply wanted life to continue the same way it had in the past—they wanted to spend time with their families; they wanted to be in their homes; they wanted to do the activities they were used to doing. Not only did this reinforce the beauty of everyday life (something we often take for granted), but it also stressed the importance of seeing these simple things through.
Overall, my time as a hospice volunteer this reminded me of my love of one-on-one interactions, motivated me to affect change in end-of-life care as a physician, and reinforced the beautiful ways in which we are all human, no matter the stage of life.