Unlike other volunteer opportunities, the pre-med hospice program through Ascend Hospice and the Athena Institute provided me the opportunity to develop my interpersonal skills on a deeper level. Throughout this program, I was given the opportunity to develop a relationship with my patient beyond surface-level engagement. I did not get to spend as much time with my patient as I had hoped to, in lieu of immunization delays and the spread of COVID-19, but I was grateful to work with the same patient in our few months together.
My patient, Meredith, was nearly 100 years old and despite her inability to maintain conversation, she was always welcoming and pleasant to be around. My favorite moments with her occurred when she was able to maintain short bouts of dialogue, mostly surrounding our loved ones. When I shared my age for the first time, that sparked a memory of her granddaughter that was just a few years older than me. Little things like this allowed us to connect deeply for a brief few moments before she lost interest entirely, but talking about family was a topic that helped jog her memory most effectively.
Meredith’s daughter was her most frequent guest, visiting nearly every day just to spend time with her. She left a journal for all of her visitors to sign when they visited, and a quick flip through showed that Meredith was deeply appreciated by those that stopped by. In fact, due to our short, few sentence conversations, I was able to learn more about her family just through the notes left for her. Another way that I was able to bond with her was through short, aromatherapy hand massages that we were trained to offer at our orientation meeting. I would often conclude our visits with hand massages as the essential oils tended to lull her to sleep. Meredith was remarkably upbeat for her age, especially compared to other patients at her center. She maintained a smile and an overall sense of positivity. She was was a joy to be around, so our time being cut so remarkably short was personally devastating.
My hospice experience forced me to confront my reservations about death head on. Conversations surrounding death used to be taboo and uncomfortable to me, but now I can hold constructive conversations about death with my friends and family. They think it’s a bit strange because I’m only in my 20s, but I’ve explained to them that the program helped me to understand that death is merely an unavoidable transition in life that we will all face. While it was difficult to come to terms with initially, I realized that life is not about how long you live, but how well you live. I never considered the importance of one’s quality of life prior to this program. I have a great respect for the few people who truly understand this concept and opt to enjoy their life, even if it is shortened due to their age or poor health conditions. This lesson has been the most impactful realization that I have come to in my few months with Ascend Hospice.
This program is also of remarkable value to anyone pursuing a career in patient care. Medical professionals, in particular, would benefit greatly from this program. Medical doctors are taught to treat patients and delay ultimate death, while this program does the complete opposite. I think it is incredibly valuable for medical students to gain hospice experience early on in their pursuit of medicine because this program humanizes the patient. Beyond the diagnosis and treatment plans, the hospice program provides students with the skills to productively engage with terminally ill patients and treat them with dignity. This program helped to reaffirm my desire to be a doctor because I would like to help humanize patients from the perspective of a doctor. Doctors are often assumed to have a lack of respect for the dignity of their patients because they are so focused on diagnosing and treating ailments, but how the patient perceives their physicians is equally important in patient care. I hope to integrate the values I’ve learned through this program into my eventual career as a physician.