As I walked into the senior living home for the first time, I felt a mix of excitement and sorrow. I was thrilled to have a patient to interact with–to provide support to–which was my role as a hospice volunteer. But when I saw my patient, my excitement faded — I saw her bed-ridden and fatigued, likely due to a long list of pain-killers and medications on her table. Quickly, I realized that garnering the attention of my patient and providing comfort was tough, as my speech was barely audible and my enthusiasm was not reciprocated. On my drive back home, I needed to change my perspective and find a way to connect with her so I could help her in the best way possible.
The next time I visited, I approached my patient’s daughter, who always came to visit her during lunch-time. Introducing myself to her and asking questions about her mother gave me insight on my patient’s likes, dislikes, and childhood. With this information, I was able to ask my patient interesting questions. Some of my favorite conversations were about her vegetable garden that she used to prepare huge meals for her family and her favorite hometown spots in Italy. For the first time, I could sense the excitement in her voice, rejuvenating her sense of purpose. She started recognizing me each week and had a warm smile across her face.
A moment that stood out to me was when my patient’s daughter told me that “she appreciated the interest I was showing in her life.” I was thrilled to hear that my weekly visits with my patient were positively impacting her daughter, and not only her mother.
Although a recovery of my patient’s chronic pains seemed possible with her newfound enthusiasm, it came to a halt: she moved on to a better place. My connection with her was not as close as that of a family member, such as her daughter, but I considered her my mentor. She gave my advice on how to lead a good life, treat everyone well, and even some regrets she had. My journey with her emphasized something that I knew when I signed up to be a hospice volunteer. Hospice is not about curing or solving a patient’s physical problem, but easing their mental stress by comforting them, as described in the videos and articles we read at the very beginning of the program. Often in developed countries, technology advancements that prolong a patient’s life overshadow methods such palliative or hospice care.
All along, I viewed medicine through the lens of diagnosing and prescribing treatments. Through hospice volunteering, I discovered the importance of compassion and care, as it positively benefits the patient and their family members who are also struggling. In my Rutgers ACES program application (for early assurance medical school), I mentioned in my supplemental essay about a physician’s duties and what hospice volunteering taught me as an aspiring physician. For now, I plan to continue being a hospice volunteer, developing the emotional awareness that is required to be a compassionate, respected physician.