Throughout the past few months as a hospice volunteer, the most important lesson illustrated to me is the essential nature of companionship at all stages of life. As a young person and college student with a strong family network, it can be easy to take for granted the consistency opportunities for conversation. Unfortunately in the U.S., our desire to oppose or escape death leads our healthcare system to often hide those who are dying from the outside world. Patients in hospitals and nursing homes are often not visited further isolating them from the outside world. Americans especially have let their fear of death consider hospice as the absolute last resort and characterize interacting with hospice patients as depressing and sad.
Atul Gawande’s Being Mortal challenges the American belief system regarding death and urges people of all ages to discuss, confront, and interact with those who are nearing the end of their life. Gawande’s personal experiences in the book inspired me to apply to be a hospice volunteer and challenge some of my preconceptions surrounding death. Although I did experience moments of sadness, I also found that my interactions with hospice patients could be awe inspiring, relaxing, and most importantly, demonstrated to me the imperative nature of hospice.
One of my favorite patient interactions was with Dan (names have been changed). Dan loved to talk about his childhood and teenage years, presenting me with serious advice and funny anecdotes. I found my conversations with Dan to push me to reflect on my life as well as appreciate the progress the U.S. has made regarding racial equality in the past five decades. Furthermore, hospice seemed to make Dan comfortable. He was not constantly dealing with trips to the doctor and treatments that could potentially make him feel worse. Sometimes Dan did not remember me week to week, but it did not matter because he simply enjoyed having someone to talk to. I hope that I provided meaningful companionship to Dan that made him feel important and cared for.
Being a hospice volunteer has confirmed my desire to be a doctor, since I enjoy caring and interacting with people in a positive way that hopefully makes them feel better. Furthermore, I think being exposed to hospice care is an invaluable experience, because I personally had not been confronted by death and the process of dying before. Learning how to cope with being surrounded by death is an essential skill to medicine and as Dr. Puri discussed in her article, “The Lesson Impermanence,” death must be looked as simply part of the circular nature of life. I have grown to become more comfortable discussing death with those around me, which I think will be especially important in the future as my grandparents and parents become older.
I look forward to continuing work as a hospice volunteer in the future and am thankful for the important life and vocational lessons I have gained. For me, hospice care attempts to find joy in life even when it is coming to a close, and it should be expanded and celebrated within U.S. healthcare.