During my experience with hospice, I learned a lot about myself and the way I view death. I only had one patient, whom I felt I got to know well, and I was thankful for the chance to interact with him. I talked with my patient about his past and learned he had many hobbies and memories of being with his family. He always seemed to be happy talking about these memories, which got me to smile as well. I was also able to interact with his family and see how they were handling the situation.
I feel as though this analogy that compares a death in hospice care to graduation from school to represent my new perspective on death that I learned from my hospice interactions. Before a student graduates, there is much work to be done in preparation for exams, and each day is spent trying to learn as much as possible. Similarly, before death, there is much work to be done in terms of gathering family and sorting out care for the person. Both scenarios involve someone moving into the next stage of their life. While grades are important in school, friendships and lessons learned are more valuable. Through hospice I have grown to put less value on material things and to greater appreciate each moment I am alive and treasure the relationships I have.
Hospice helped prepare my medical school application by allowing me to interact with a patient and his family. I was able to get a better understanding that the situation surrounding treatments is often more complicated than just what is physiologically best for the patient. I was in the room several times when the family would talk about the difficulty of keeping up treatments. I could see them struggling with the work, but they also knew it had to be done. Even before entering hospice, I had the goal of helping others through difficult times and considered this my vocation. After interacting with my patient, my ideal of medically helping a person changed from getting them healthy, to providing a person with the best quality of life possible. For example, a simple conversation with a patient was enough to get them to smile a few extra times in the day, and this is an important way to help them too.
I’ve also gained a new medical goal to not always fight death, but rather to strive to enhance a person’s life through treatments. Returning to the graduation analogy, there is emotion to consider. Like students before graduation and hospice patients, the coming change often brings sadness. Graduation day can be a relief for those who have put in so much work, but it is still sad to see the day arrive, even though it has been prepared for a long time. A good death is nothing to be feared, but rather celebrated, and this is done by making the most of each moment.